Out of the corner of my eye, I see rocks with flowers and cactus leapinto the air and birds that sing songs because the Ponderosa pine had ameeting and said sing sing for us today and I see all these things andwonder what's going to happen next

Out of the corner of my eye, lately I see things out of the of the corner of my eye, of course I know these things happen, and I expected them to happen, it's still surprises me sometimes,

especially when Grayrocks that look like they just came from inside the earth without any introduction speak and say, "blooming flowers", bright yellow flowers

exactly like the sun or like an egg yolk from a humming bird. and it can happen even in the middle of the night maybe during the full moon or really any time the gray rocks Bloom unexpectedly with yellow flowers, could be the middle of winter, it can happen any time, all of it can happen anytime, seeing it out of the corner of my eye.

I see rocks suddenly bloom with yellow flowers the color of hummingbird egg yolks and cactus leap,

cholla and beaver tails, fishhook and bisnaga. Fat saguaros about to explode with water at their bursting  point where they can't drink anymore, they've drunk so much water they're drunk.

These giant Saguaros weighing  thousands of pound leap into the air and do cartwheels, or dive straight towards the rocks Like red tailed Hawks after mice and cotton tail rabbits. of course, I asked for this. I stood on top of the mountain during the EtaAquriad meteor shower during the Perseids and said to San Pedro, Saint Peter,

I said "Teach me about the flowers. Tell me about the Milky Way. Show me the plants. Bring me the Virgin Mary, so I can ask her questions. Give me the keys to the kingdom of heaven. Bring her back, bring her back. Why did you send her away?"

   

I was in the middle of the Ancha. I was wasting my time waiting for the sun to go down. watching the sunset watching the Ponderosa pine trees.

I was actually laying on my back looking at the sky looking at the clouds wondering whether it would rain. It was then that I saw that the Sierra Ancha Mountain was walking.

I saw that here we may have walking mountains.  These mountains are walking on the clouds. I saw the Sierra Ancha move into the sky and stand above the clouds, on top of the clouds. the Ponderosa pine circled and began to speak.

And these Pondarosa Pines in the Sierra Ancha know everything. they decide things that I never knew like what bird will sing which song, how long and what key. and what cottontail rabbit would meet the Red tailed hawk, and be like Jesus Or one of the Saints, or the Virgin Mary

because when you speak of these medicines they easily give up their life for all the flowers,  for all the trees,  for all the frogs so that they all could live and attain salvation. They call forward all the animals and decide which skunk will become the medicine skunk of the feathery Star Solomon Seal.

 Or birds that sing songs because the Ponderosa pine had a meeting and said sing sing for us today and I see all these things and wonder what's going to happen? 

     Of course, As I said, I asked for this, I begged and pleaded for this and maybe someone helped me get it or sent something my way. Maybe it was Nevy Jensen, from Grey Mountain

so many years ago we asked him to come and like most things that you ask for you're never sure if they're going to happen, until the the last minute he finally came and I remember he couldn't come through the door he had to come from the back door the back door faced toward the south with his medicine bundle he came to our house and he blessed the house and he dressed me nicely with turquoise beads

and bob cat fur, he had me sit on a deerskin and now I know it was the medicine deerskin for my medicine deer may be up on the Mesa or up near the Ancha with the medicine deer.

     There was a place near our house where the sagebrush grew thick and sweet. Not like the sage brush on the mountain or the mesa. This was medicine Sage brush. This was medicine sagebrush Nevy Jensen he called it 'Tsahh' this was like a sagebrush house or Tsahh bikinnh  or inscription house it was the Artemisia tridetata. 

     Sweet spicy tsahh. It was sweet. it was sweet like estafiate. Sweet like altamisa.

Even sweeter. It was sweet like water dripping ice cold down a cliff face.

it was sweet like rain scented with rabbit brush and sage. It was sweet like rain scented with creosote bush. It was sweet like the rain scented with piñon pine. it was sweet like the rain scented with Ponderosa pine, Arizona Cypress. it was sweet like the sweetest Ocotillo flowers

orange dripping with nectar the ants gather.  it was sweet like the sound of woman's voice calling your name asking you to come towards her. it was sweet like her breasts

thick fat with milk. it was sweet like yellow evening primrose flowers.

it was sweet like datura flowers. it was sweet like the fluffy downy fur that covers the medicine deer up on the Ancha. 

    This sage brush, It was in the bottom of the valley in the red rocks, in a place like a cave where there were pictures on the rocks,  pictures of deer, medicine deer and butterflies and circles that go round and round, like our lives live around and around. we always come back to this point.

In the center of the circle. that is between us what makes us who we are and also makes us who were not. Because we go round and round this point just like the sun and the moon and the clouds go around and around in the medicine deer sagebrush circle, along the coxcomb that's what Nevy Jensen knew. That's why he came. 

     So I trace it back to that day when he came to our house said all those prayers and dressed me with turquoise and sprinkled me with cornpollen had me repeat the prayers that he said even though I didn't know what the words meant I repeated what he said as best I could and they were like seeds to grow in my heart and since that time ever since that time I've seen out of the corner my eyes. 

     I've watched and waited I stood waiting for a train.

A  train that I got on long ago. I got on the train but I never got off I kept riding, riding. and it took me places and then when I watched and waited it was like an old man got off the train.

now I am an old man I'm not sure if the young boy is still riding on the train. I watch. i look maybe someone will come today, maybe someone will come to my house, or your house, or the deer house or this Ancha medicine house. May be one of the angels and saints will bring me a story or a song, show me a new plant

or tell me how to make medicine, good strong medicine that is to open up the heart. 

    and like I said before I wanted to meet a teacher so I had to become a student, or like a student so I could meet the teacher face to face. 

      So I called on the Virgin.

 I went to the Virgin Mary, The Blessed Mother, the mother of all good things, the one who gives birth to everything to her son Jesus Christ. the Virgin Mary gives birth to all the animals. Virgin Mary gives birth to the flowers. the Virgin Mary stands with us and she doctors us at times shows us the way and new things. New heavens and new earths, right here among us.  I offered her what I could I offered her some Yerba Santa

and some creosote some Ocotillo flowers,  a nice piece of fruit, some holy water,  watered where I sat down and said the rosary day after day waiting for her and I called on the Nuestra Señora de Los Remedios, the remedies. 

      One thing for sure Virgin Mary's with us at every moment and she helps us on this medicine road. she could help you too don't be afraid  to ask her. come to her with a humble heart maybe you could drink the tea of Ocotillo flowers or make a tincture of Ocotillo and then use the brittle-bush,    Maybe Aristalochia

or maybe cypress may be the desert willow whatever it is, use as many plants as you can to come to the Virgin Mary. Or use only one single pink wild roseblossom, or a bunch of blackberries,

use whatever you like. Just come to her.   I asked her to be my teacher and she's always been with me virgin Guadalupe, mother of miraculous medals. It took me sometime to see that she was the first woman. she was like Eve in the garden of Eden transformed and she came like a changing woman. I think she was probably the same as Nahasdan Nadelee who stood on the other side of the river

and she was very sad when she saw all the monsters that men created. she came to Transform them she came with corn pollen and good medicine and showed us this medicine road that goes from Horizon to horizon, following the Milky Way that's the marriage of Mary to Joseph.

Guadalupe to teach all of Us. teach all the people about all the plants. She is still here today, up there on the Ancha. You can see her sometimes out of the corner of your eye when you reach down to touch the plant, holding the plant in your hand, she can make me feel  her hand on my hand and she'll show you which plant to choose and how to use it. I think the Virgin Mary is the medicine maker.

I think she's the mother of all medicines and I think she's with me here right now and I think she's probably with you too she's everywhere she's like the sun that shines or the rain that falls around you. Don't be afraid though she is very happy and she likes to laugh. 

     People forget that the Virgin Mary was a young girl

she likes to laugh and dance and sing and I think that she was probably like the dancer Salome or Herodias and she asked for St. John the Baptist's head. she didn't care she did what she had to do. She will bring you on this medicine road

      At first I thought my teacher would be a woman or a man or or maybe even someone that I would meet and talk to, but now I'm not sure. I think now my teachers are rocks or trees or plants to just look look at me in the eye and have something to say and I have to eat the leaves and taste your fruits and lay down on my back and touch where you come out of the ground

with my fingers and listen to your song. 

      So I sit with the plants and I place my fingers right where the come out of the ground and I touch their leaves and smell the flowers. I lean down close to them and chew the leaf in my mouth, I put it underneath my tongue or place it on my lips and just wait and watch pray always praying. i  taste and watch and wait and see what happens and if they have sweet taste, salty taste. is it sweet? or sour, or bitter?

      It takes a long way to learn things this way

sometimes I wonder how far I can go in if I can keep going or if I'll just quit and forget everything and pretend it never happened.

    I wonder if I'll go crazy and forget everything anyway or something dangerous will happen like a lightning bolt explodes, like the time lightning hit the saguaro. I was walking for a long time and maybe I didn't have enough water to drink and maybe that was it maybe I was just dehydrated, my mouth was dry but I was walking along the Ridgetop..

.then all of a sudden the cloud came over and it was just a small cloud and it made a shadow and then a lightning bolt came and exploded and hit a saguaro, split it into pieces. It was a green saguaro and all of a sudden it turned into sticks like sticks, dry sticks,  saguaro ribs curved toward the sun,  facing towards the sky and I wondered what happened.

 I saw the medicine deer fly out of this world, leap into the air like a bird without wings carrying  in its mouth yerba santa, Altamisa,  when you see things like that you wonder how far can you go? Does it really need to happen this way? Did any of this happen? Yes it did happen exactly in this way,

just like I told you.